Jennifer Lopez says her ‘whole f—ing world exploded’ amid Ben Affleck divorce, but ‘a relationship doesn’t define me’
“I used to say I’m a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, ‘No, I’m actually good.'”
Jennifer Lopez has admitted that, yes, “it’s f—ing hard” navigating a high-profile celebrity divorce.
After the 55-year-old superstar and actor Ben Affleck, 52, separated earlier this year following two years of marriage, the pop icon opened up to comedian Nikki Glaser in a new interview with Interview Magazine about navigating the downfall of the resurgence of their heavily publicized relationship.
“And yeah, there’s times when I thought I figured it out, and then life goes, ‘Let’s send you another thing and see if you fall for it. Let’s see if you really have learned that lesson.’ And I hadn’t. I understand that now in a much deeper way, which doesn’t mean that I won’t make mistakes in the future, but again, when your whole house blows up, you’re standing there in the rubble going, ‘How do I not ever let that happen again?'” Lopez said. “And then you start examining it little by little saying, ‘Okay, I did this, this was my part in it, this was what I should have seen early on, this is what I didn’t look at.’ Those things are what really are the lessons.”
She also explained her decision behind taking time off amid her divorce, which many speculated led to the aforementioned cancellation of the tour.
“You have to be complete, if you want something that’s more complete. You have to be good on your own. I thought I learned that, but I didn’t. And then, this summer, I had to be like, ‘I need to go off and be on my own. I want to prove to myself that I can do that,'” Lopez continued, adding that “it feels lonely, unfamiliar, scary” to confront her own vulnerability in that way.
“But when you sit in those feelings and go, ‘These things are not going to kill me,’ it’s like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself. Being in a relationship doesn’t define me,” she said. “I can’t be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself. I used to say I’m a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, ‘No, I’m actually good.'”
Glaser speculated that Lopez now has “a new bar for the next person that comes along,” to which the performer replied, “Here’s the thing: There’s no new bar because I’m not looking for anybody. How’s that?”
After marrying on July 16, 2022 in Las Vegas, Lopez and Affleck separated in April 2024, and Lopez filed for divorce on Aug. 20 — a symbolic date, as it marked the second anniversary of a traditional 2022 ceremony the couple had in Georgia.
Professionally, though, Lopez has a bright spot on the horizon as she received glowing reviews at the Toronto International Film Festival in September for her supporting performance in the upcoming sports drama Unstoppable, which was produced by Affleck.
In the film, she plays Judy Robles, the mother of Anthony Robles (Jharrel Jerome), a college wrestler who, despite being born with one leg, went on to win a national wrestling championship. At TIFF, Lopez told Entertainment Weekly about connecting with Judy ahead of playing her.
“I really got to talk to her about how she felt about being a mom, being a mom to a child that was handicapped, being a person who was really kind of lost and in bad relationships and had to kind of figure herself out while she was raising these five kids,” said Lopez, who shares 16-year-old twins, Emme and Max, with ex-husband Marc Anthony, later adding: “To see what her story is at the end of the movie, that she has a PhD, but her son inspired her to do that because she supported her son, it’s a beautiful kind of exchange of love and selflessness that they both had.”
